MISSIONARIES HERE AT HLC ON JUNE 12^TH

Dr. Kristopher and Rebecca Hartwig and family will be visiting with us at Hayward on Monday, June 12^th. All members of the Hayward-Trondhjem Parish are invited to come and join together as we welcome them to our parish and community, share a meal together, and have an opportunity to hear from them and also see some pictures about their work in Tanzania. Here’s the plan:

5:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m. – A time to meet and greet and talk with the Hartwigs.

6:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m. – Share together in a potluck meal

7:00 p.m. – The Hartwig’s will give a talk and present a power point presentation on their work in Tanzania. They will also share their musical talents as well.

Also, keep in mind Rebecca’s request for piano and other instrumental music books, and even for gifts of musical instruments.

Come and bring the whole family and let’s all learn about what is happening with our brothers and sisters in Christ in Tanzania.

THE GIDEON MINISTRY

Mr. Steve Zenk, representing the Gideon Ministry, will be at both HLC and TLC on Sunday, June 25^th. You are asked to share a gift with this ministry as you leave worship that day. The Gideons have a worldwide ministry of distributing Bibles and New Testaments to people who have need. In some places they cannot supply the need fast enough. Your contributions help to support this ministry, where hundreds of thousands of scriptures are provided each year.

LET’S HAVE SOME FUN AND HAVE A PARADE AND A PICNIC!!!

THAT WAS THE SUGGESTION, AT A RECENT Hayward Boosters meeting, by Pastor John and Sharon for this summer’s Hayward Days festivities. So, guess who’s in charge of getting a parade together? Riiiight!

Here’s the idea at this point: On Saturday, July 8^th, the parade will form at about 4 p.m. along the 200^th street road south and east of the cemetery. At 4:30 p.m. the Parade will begin and move north on Main Street to East 2^nd Street, then turn right and go east to Armstrong, then left and north to Front Street, then left and west, past Nick’s Store to West Street by the old Lumber Yard building, then left onto West Street and south to the old school and ball park, where the parade will end. After the parade, all are invited to mosey on uptown for some brats and hot dogs and listen to the music on Main Street.

There is no entry registration or fee for this parade. Just show up at the starting point on 200^th Street at about 4 p.m. You can bring a car or pickup and ride in the parade; you can ride a tractor or lawn mower. You can decorate your vehicle in any crazy way. You can dress up in costume; you can walk or ride a bike. You can pull a trailer and make up crazy signs. Just be festive!

Think safety in all of this. Children should be accompanied by an adult. Let’s get the Senior citizens on board as well. Anybody want to make up a band? Put them on a hayrack and play up a storm. Need other marching music? Plug a CD into your vehicle radio and blast away!

Here’s a switch: Let’s have everyone in the parade and no one left to watch it! But, of course, there will always be the watchers. Line them up on the curb (grass) and have the candy ready!

SPREAD THE WORD!! Tell neighbors, friends, relatives, former “Haywardites”.

ABOUT THE PICNIC

On Sunday morning at 10:00 a.m. (weather permitting) there will be a community outdoor worship on the Hayward church lawn in its usual place. You can come to the HLC social hall during the hour beforehand to have a cup of coffee. Then, AFTER THE WORSHIP, let’s plan to have a good, outdoor potluck picnic for all who wish to come and participate. We will have tables provided for this. Bring along a chair to sit on for the worship time. The local 4-H group will have games, etc., for the children, and perhaps for the adults as well. Come and enjoy the day and the outdoors and celebrate your community!!

THE DaVINCI CODE = NO CODE

Have you read “The DaVinci Code,” or now that it’s out, have you seen the movie? I have done both. Well, as you may have heard, it is a very interesting story, but it IS totally fiction. If you know your Bible pretty well, and you are certain in your faith that Jesus Christ is God’s Son, Savior, then there is nothing in these fictions that will be a threat to you. For those who may be on the fringe of the Christian faith or the church, this may present something that is confusing, and to some it gives more ammunition or excuses as to why Christianity is to be dismissed or debunked.

The general premise of “The Code” centers on a woman who has a rather prominent place in the gospels, especially with the resurrection stories. Her name is Mary of Magdala. Magdala was a small town on the coast of Lake Galilee. In Jesus’ day it was a predominantly Gentile town of considerable wealth because of ship building, fish sales and other forms of trade. Because of its wealth and the gentile inhabitants, it did have a reputation for much greed and sexual promiscuity. All that stands on that site today are a small chapel and some foundation ruins. The Bible doesn’t tell us that Jesus ever visited that city, but at some point in Galilee, he did have an encounter with Mary. Luke 8 mentions that Jesus expelled seven demons from her, after which she became a loyal follower of Jesus, and, along with the woman Joanna, gave much financial support to Jesus and His disciples during their travels around Galilee and Judea.

Mary’s identification with the sinful Magdala, and with imagined assumptions about the demons that possessed her, the church came to assume that she was a reformed prostitute. There is nothing in the Bible that even suggests that such is the case. Having been saved from the literal hell and turmoil of such demon possession, it seems natural that Mary, or any person who had such a cure, would come to be very devoted to Jesus. She apparently had the time and the means to be free to follow Jesus and to offer forms of practical service to them. She stayed with them even into those final days in Jerusalem and was a witness to Jesus’ crucifixion and burial, and then, of course, to His resurrection on the third day.

Surprisingly enough, after reporting to the disciples that she had truly seen Jesus resurrected and alive, the biblical writers make no more mention of her. And that is the point where other non-biblical stories and reports and myths began to arise about this Mary of Magdala, and what then led to the fictional story, “The DaVinci Code.”

That fictional story says that Jesus and Mary Magdalene were husband and wife, or had some kind of sexual relationship, and that Mary, at the time of Jesus’ death, was pregnant with child. After the resurrection, and the forming of the church, and the persecutions that began against Christians in Palestine, some followers of Jesus arranged to smuggle Mary safely out of Palestine and she was transported to Spain and then to France. There, she gave birth to a daughter. The story continues that the leaders of the Roman church eventually found out about this and ever since have done all in their power to do away with any possible descendants of Jesus and Mary. Thus, there also arose a group of followers loyal to Mary and Jesus who gave their vow to protect this family from any attempts at annihilation. That group produced a vow and an elaborate CODE to keep this family safe and anonymous. Again, remember that this is all an elaborate fiction, but one that is built around known historical groups and societies both within and without the church.

Here is where I think that the DaVinci Code goes AGAINST the very CODE OF GOD: There is clearly no mention in the New Testament of any kind of a marriage or a husband-wife relationship between Jesus and Mary Magdalene. Nor is there any mention of any kind of illicit relationship. Thus, if Mary and Jesus had a sexual relationship and Mary became pregnant, then that totally does away with all that the biblical writers said about Jesus as one who was perfectly human and perfectly God’s Son (True Man and True God). Jesus’ “perfection” was in His being “without sin,” that He was perfectly OBEDIENT to the will of His Heavenly Father, and thus ever RIGHTEOUS in God’s sight. And THAT is what the scriptures proclaim to us. Here is the WITNESS: “For we do NOT have a High Priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who in every respect has been tested as we are, yet WITHOUT SIN. (Heb. 4:15)” “For our sake, God made Him (Jesus) to be sin who knew no sin, so that IN Him we might become the righteousness of God (II Cor. 5:21)” Peter quotes Isaiah 53: “He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in His mouth. (I Peter 2:22.)”

“Those who have been born of God do not sin, because God’s seed abides in them; they cannot sin, because they have been born of God. (I John 3:9)” Jesus kept the CODE OF GOD perfectly: The Righteousness Code, the Law Code, Man’s Code and God’s Code – all perfectly. For Jesus to keep that Code perfectly is our very salvation. By faith we place ourselves into that very perfection of Christ – we cover ourselves with Christ Jesus. The Apostle Paul tells us that when we, by faith, cover ourselves with Christ, that this is what God sees – he sees us as He sees His own Son, and thus can say to us “Well done, good and faithful servant, enter into the joy of the Lord (Matt 25:23).”

There it is. Make Jesus Christ your CODE, and leave the likes of the DaVinci Code to the realms of pure fiction.

Pastor John

.

OPPORTUNITIES FOR HOLY COMMUNION

June 4 Day of Pentecost

June 11 Holy Trinity

A THANK YOU FROM NEPAL SOCIAL SERVICE FUND

Hayward Lutheran and Trondhjem Lutheran received a “thank you” from Nepal Social Service Fund for the $331.24 that was sent to them from our Lenten Offerings.

The following was received from Bev and Earl Thompson:

“Thank you for your generous donation!! As you have heard on the news, Nepal has been in a political turmoil, but with a ground-swell of opposition to the king, the parliament has been reinstated and they have an agreement with rebels to have an election and draw up a new constitution. The rebels have announced a 3-month cease-fire. Peace is now possible.

Bev & Earl Thompson

AMERICAN CANCER SOCIETY “RELAY FOR LIFE” PLANNED

The American Cancer Society “Relay for Life” will be on the evening of August 11^th at the Freeborn County Fairground. Sharon Seidel says, “I am on a team for this very important fund-raiser and I feel very blessed to be able to do this. My team has a goal set and really needs help in order to meet that goal. I also have Luminary bags that can be purchased with a $10.00 donation and the name of a loved one will be placed on it for the opening ceremony of the Relay. If you would like to make a tax-deductible contribution to this very important cause, you can send it to me at: 1811 Lakewood Ave., Albert Lea, MN 56007 or call me at 377-1013. Thank you.”

--------Sharon Seidel

TRONDHJEM NEWS

JUNE ASSIGNMENTS

Altar Guild

Charlotte Lukes

Coffee Servers

June 4 Mark & Debra Brekke

June 18 Sunday School

Communion Assistants

Steve & Linda Kraushaar

Lectors

June 4 Jill Krause

June 11 Steve Kraushaar

June 18 Sheldon Lukes

June 25 Linda Kraushaar

JUNE ACOLYTE/USHERS

June 4 Daniel Jax

June 11 Cortney Thostenson

Youth Usher: Reed Thostenson

June 18 Garrett Lukes

June 25 Matt Reese

JUNE BIRTHDAYS

June 3 Charlotte Lukes

June 7 Art Fann

June 9 Sheldon Lukes

June 10 Brenda Krause

June 12 Gilma Bothum

June 13 Adam Brekke

June 15 Doris Benesh

June 18 Randy Lukes

JUNEANNIVERSARIES

June 15 Mona and Randy Lukes

June 23 Doris & Ken Benesh

June 29 Annette & Kim Naatz

MEMORIALS

GENERAL FUND

In memory of ROBERT OLSON by M/M Roger Krause.

In memory of MAVIS BILLADEAU by M/M Jim Benesh, Sr., M/M Emil Prantner, Gilma Bothum.

In memory of MABLE LARSON by M/M Jim Benesh, Sr.

In memory of BRUCE MITTAG by M/M Jim Benesh, Sr.

In memory of HENRY NELSON by M/M Jim Benesh, Sr.

MISSIONS

In memory of MAVIS BILLADEAU by WELCA

BUILDING FUND

In memory of MAVIS BILLADEAU by M/m Dale Lukes & Anna Johnson

In memory of RICHARD SIGURDSON by Anna Johnson

In memory of MAYNARD JOHNSON by Anna Johnson.

TRONDHJEM WELCA “BUSY BEES”

April has been a very busy month for us, including breakfast in Austin, our annual Salad Luncheon, and sending off our projects for World Relief. We were able to send quilts, health kits, sewing kits and soap. One-fourth of the quilts made are given away in our area.

We are looking forward to our lunch in Austin on June 22^nd and the Pie and Ice Cream Social on August 27^th. Starting October 12^th we will tie quilts for five Thursdays, ending November 9^th.

We greatly appreciate all the support we receive from members and friends.

-------WELCA Officers

TWO TRONDHJEM YOUTH GRADUATED

Cameron Kolbe and Jessica Naatz graduated from Glenville-Emmons High School on May 26^th.

CAMERON is the son of Berry and Tracy Jahnke. He is planning to attend The University of Minnesota. There will be an OPEN HOUSE in his honor on Friday, May 26^th at 8 p.m. at his home.

JESSICA is the daughter of Kim and Annette Naatz. She is planning to attend Riverland Community College.

There will be an OPEN HOUSE in her honor on May 27^th from 1:30 – 5 p.m. at her home.

TRONDHJEM FINANCIAL REPORT

Where We Monthly Where We Ending

Should Be Income Are Balance

Jan. $2,557 $2,453 $2,453 -$104

Feb $5,115 $2,327.94 $4,780.94 -$334.06

March $7.672 $2,147.10 $6,928.04 -$743.96

Apr. $10,230 $2,834 $9,762.04 -$467.96

HAYWARD NEWS

MISSION STATEMENT

We the people of Hayward Lutheran Church confess the Triune God, and strive to follow the words and deeds of Jesus Christ.

VISION STATEMENT

As a community of faith in Jesus Christ, we will demonstrate care and compassion for one another and also to a world in much need. God’s Word and the Holy Sacraments are central to our life of faith. As we grow and are nourished by these, we will bring the good news of God’s forgiveness, life and salvation to those around us.

HAYWARD LUTHERAN

OUR STEWARDSHIP FOR 2006

Month Where we Where Total Should be We Are Expenses

(As of 5/23) (As of 5/23)

January $ 8,902 $ 8,403 $ 8,098

February $17,803 $15,108 $15,553

March $26,705 $26,486 $26,319

April $34,607 $34,748 $36,380

May $53,410 $42,305 $42,910

July $62,312

August $71,213

September $80,115

October $89,015

November $97,918

December $106,820

HAYWARD LUTHERAN CONGREGATIONSAL COUNCIL MEETING

April 23, 2006 – 11:45 a.m.

Present: Pastor Malm, Curt Larson, Wes Tennis, Sharon Malm, Louie Larson, Sonja Johnson, Vickie Storlie, Darlene Gilby, Keith Iverson, Kendall Johnson and Pat Frydenlund.

President, Keith Iverson, called the meeting to order. It was moved, seconded and carried to approve the Agenda with additions.

MSC to approve the Secretary’s Report.

After being reviewed, it was MSC to approve the Treasurer’s Report.

A humidifier was purchased for the parsonage.

The Long-Range Planning Committee reported on several ideas that were discussed, including:

-Redoing the Social Hall Roof

- New carpet in the sanctuary

- Add youth to committees

- Changing the front of the sanctuary – chancel area.

- Siding and windows of the Social Hall

- Entrance on the west side

- Alternative heating sources for the church

- Talking with other rural churches about long-range plans for parishes.

MSC for the Long-Range Planning Committee to pursue discussion of the above.

Properties

An insurance report was given. MSC to make changes in insurance coverage.

MSC to add DSL to the church computer through Qwest.

Lou Larson will provide lawn weed spray for the church proper through the season.

MSC to provide five hundred general offering envelopes to use as needed during worship for members and visitors.

Thrivent Coordinators are Gwen Hanson, Marlene Thompson and Sharon Malm. MSC for the Easter breakfast funds to be divided equally between Habitat for Humanity and Sunday School Day Camp Program. The cost to each child or family for Day Camp should be put as low as possible.

Keith Iverson reminded us that fluorescent light bulbs should not go into the regular garbage. Hazardous waste disposal is free and comes to Hayward on June 28^th from noon to 3 p.m. at the Community Center.

The Sunday School children will recite their memory work at worship on May 21^st.

Committees are being formed for projects that are being discussed for the church.

There was discussion on youth connection with the church.

Respectfully submitted,

Pat Frydenlund, Secretary

JUNE ASSIGNMENTS

Altar Guild

Sally Anderson and Sharon Seidel

Coffee Servers

June 4 Vern & Bev Lunde

June 11 Ken & Barb Schroeder

June 18 Louie 7 Stephanie Larson

June 25 Dave & Paulette Paulson

Ushers

*Nick & Jeanne Schermer

Curtis Larson

Ken & Barb Schroeder

Communion Assistants

Curt Larson & Pat Frydenlund

Lectors

June 4 Shirley Gray

June 11 Sandra & Jalen Jimenez

June 18 Phil Tennis

June 25 Logan Tufte

JUNE ACOLYTE/USHERS

June 4 Caylee Tennis & Dahna Wright

June 11 McKenzie Gilby & Mitchell Skaar

Youth Usher: Mackenzie Berhow

June 18 Logan & Tate Tufte

June 25 Jalen Jimenez & Kadie Habana

JUNE BIRTHDAYS

June 5 Janice Habana

June 6 Justin Erickson

June 7 David Thompson

June 9 Shirley Olson

June 9 Ben Berhow

June 11 Judy Olson

June 12 Neal Skaar

June 13 Floyd Matson

June 15 Sue Braff

June 16 Janet Kromminga

June 21 Jeanne Schermer

June 22 Tracy Skaar

June 28 Beverly Jenson

June 29 Elaine Flusek

JUNE ANNIVERSARIES

June 8 Greg & Carolyn Matson

June 12 Jim & Nancy Skaar

June 14 Cheryl & Kurt Freitag

June 15 Paul & Edith Samuelson

June 20 Dean & Kellie Anderson

June 21 Gary & Paula Broitzman

June 22 John & Sharon Malm

MEMORIALS

GENERAL FUND

In memory of MABEL LARSON by Randy Eggum

COPIER FUND

In memory of MABEL LARSON by James & Vicki

Larson

In memory of H.C. NELSON by Camilla Frydenlund and Scott Nelson

WELCA REFURBISHING FUND

In memory of DON AAKRE by M/M Paul Westland.

In memory of MABLE LARSON by M/M Paul Westland

CEMETERY FUND

In memory of H. C. Nelson by M/M Dale Westland

OUR SYMPATHY is extended to the family of HENRY CLAY (H.C.) NELSON who died May 14^th. His funeral was held on May 19^th. We also extend OUR SYMPATHY to the family of MABEL MELVINA LARSON who died May 7^th. Her funeral was May 20^th.

NEW MEMBERS WELCOMED!

On Sunday, May 7^th, Erwin J. and Ruth (Sorlien) Larson were welcomed into the fellowship of Hayward Lutheran. They are returning home to membership at HLC after several years. “Red” and Ruth live on the east side of Austin, just south of the airport. “Red” is brother to the late Curt Larson, Sr. and Everett Larson.

THANK YOU

The family of Henry (H. C.) Nelson would like to express our sincere appreciation to all for cards, letters, and kind deeds. To Pastor John and Sharon, thank you so much for your support and prayers. Also, much appreciation to those of you who helped with the lunch served the day of the funeral and for your hard work.

Sincerely,

The family of H.C.

KNOWN TO HAVE BEEN HOSPITALIZED

Helen Dockwell and Henry Nelson in Albert Lea

FIVE HAYWARD YOUTH TO GRADUATE

On Friday, June 2, five young people from Hayward Lutheran will graduate from Albert Lea High School. They are Benjamin Berhow, Justin Erickson, Michael Larson, Melissa Sather and Brooke Woitas.

BEN BERHOW is the son of Brian & Nancy Berhow. He plans to attend The University of Minnesota, pursuing Education and Coaching degree. He will also wrestle for the Minnesota Gophers. There will be an OPEN HOUSE in his honor on June 17^th from 2-6 p.m. at his home, 81638 – 200^th St., Hayward, MN 56043.

JUSTIN ERICKSON is the son of Garry & Jill Erickson. He plans to work at Albert Lea Tribune and attend the School of Art & Design in Minneapolis. An OPEN HOUSE in his honor will be held on June 3 from 1-4 p.m. at his home, 1626 Crystal Dr., Albert Lea.

MICHAEL LARSON is the son of Curt & Natalie Larson. He plans to attend NIACC in Mason city beginning in June studying construction. An OPEN HOUSE in his honor will be held June 10 from 4-7 p.m. at his home, 82702 – 185^th St., Hayward, MN.

MELISSA SATHER IS THE DAUGHTER OF John & Kris Schultz and Brad & Christine Sather. She plans to attend The College of St. Scholastica, majoring in Advertising and Public Relations with a minor in Spanish. There will be an OPEN HOUSE in her honor on June 3 from 12 noon – 3 p.m. at her home, 68320 – 240^th St., Alden, MN.

BROOKE WOITAS is the daughter of Scott and Kim Woitas. She plans to attend The College of St. Scholastica, majoring in Nursing. An OPEN HOUSE in her honor will be held June 11 from 9 a.m. – Noon at her home, 80418 – 215^th St., Hayward.

ALTAR GUILD

WOULD YOU LIKE TO CONTRIBUTE FRESH FLOWERS?

Fresh flowers for the altar are a beautiful addition to our worship service. If you wish to furnish flowers, all you need to do is call the Altar Guild president, Marlene Thompson (373-3895). The Guild will purchase and display the flowers for you, and if you wish, will put an acknowledgement in the Sunday bulletin. Cost of the flowers is usually about $20. Your generosity and support are greatly appreciated. Thank you.

WELCA NEWS

PURPOSE STATEMENT

As a community of women created in the image of god, called to discipleship in Jesus Christ, and empowered by the Holy Spirit, we commit ourselves to grow in faith, affirm our gifts, support one another in our callings, engage in ministry and action, and promote healing and wholeness in the church, the society and the world.

BLUE EARTH RIVER CONFERENCE

Submitted by Joanne Wertjes

On April 1, 2006, Blue Earth River Conference Women of the ELCA gathered for the Spring Event at Cross of Glory Lutheran Church, Hartland, MN. Assisting WELCA Units were East Freeborn Lutheran, Albert Lea, and West Freeborn Lutheran, Hartland.

Organist was Judy Wyrum. Kristen Simon-Frank gave the welcome and provided special music. Genie Hanson gave devotions.

Temple talks were given by Kathy Bolin, representing Good Earth Village, and Esther Ziemer shared information about “Safe Passage”, a dump ministry in Guatemala. Offering meditation was given by Joy Christian.

The message, “Building Global Community in South America through Christ” was presented by Genie Hanson and Andrea Groskreutz.

The business meeting was conducted by Minnie Dunbar, BE River Conference convener. 2006-2007 officers were installed.

The 2007 Spring Event will be hosted by Emmons Lutheran Church, assisted by Lunder Lutheran Church, Albert lea, MN and Bethel Lutheran Church, Scarville, IA.

COME TO GOOD EARTH VILLAGE WOMEN’S DAY!!

Saturday, June 24^th, 2006 9:00 a.m. – 3:00 p.m.

Good Earth Village invites all women and their friends to the Annual Women’s Day program for fellowship, Bible Study, worship, wagon rides, great food, and fun programs!

INTRODUCTION TO 2006-2007 LUTHERAN WOMEN TODAY BIBLE STUDY - Good Earth Village welcomes Dr. Terence and Faith Fretheim, authors of the Bible Study “Hope in God in Times of Suffering” for the 2006-2007 Lutheran Women Today. Faith is retired from the Women of the ELCA in Chicago. Dr. Fretheim is a professor of Old Testament at Luther Seminary in St. Paul. The Fretheims are frequent Bible Study leaders and presenters around the country.

PLAYING DRESS-UP: The stories and clothes of our lives – From rummage sale finds to family heirlooms, Mary L. Schmidt has had a life-long passion for clothes and stories that they tell. Having told stories in her classrooms for years, Mary started taking her closet, and stories of life’s ups and downs, on the road in 1997. “Playing Dress-Up” is a delightful and heart-warming presentation. It is one you don’t want to miss.

Cost for this event is $20/person, and includes lunch, program and morning snack.

QUILT AUCTION – AUGUST 13^TH

The 21^st Annual Good Earth Village Quilt Auction will be held on Sunday, August 13^th. We will begin the day with worship at 10:30 a.m. and the Concession stand will open at 11:30 a.m. Quilts will be on display until the live auction begins at 1:00 p.m. A silent auction will also be held. Please come enjoy the day at camp and help support the ministry of Good Earth Village. Anyone wishing to donate a quilt for the auction is asked to have them to the camp by August 1^st.

DAY CAMP BEGINNING SOON!!

Day Camp will be held from June 19-23^rd from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. Monday through Thursday and from 9 a.m. to Noon on Friday.

If you can provide cookies and/or juice for the snack during Day Camp, please contact Nancy Berhow at 373-0138 or 373-7244.

THIS ‘N’ THAT

FATHER’S DAY HISTORY

The idea for creating a day for children to honor their fathers began in Spokane, Washington. A woman by the name of Sonora Smart Dodd thought of the idea for Father’s Day while listening to a Mother’s Day sermon in 1909. Having been raised by her father, Henry Jackson Smart, after her mother died, Sonora wanted her father to know how special he was to her. It was her father that made all the parental sacrifices and was, in the eyes of his daughter, a courageous, selfless and loving man. Sonora’s father was born in June, so she chose to hold the first Father’s Day celebration in Spokane, Washington on the 19^th of June, 1910.

In 1924 President Calvin Coolidge proclaimed the third Sunday in June as Father’s Day. Roses are the Father’s Day flowers: red to be worn for a living father and white if the father has died.

LOOKING BACKWARD

“THE ANDY GRIFFITH SHOW”

You probably remember the beginning scene of “The Andy Griffith Show” where Andy and Opie are shown walking together down the path to the lake or river with fishing poles in hand. You can probably also hum or whistle the show’s whistled theme song (the tune to which is no doubt going through your head right now). The lyrics were rarely heard. They were written by Everett Sloane, Earle Hagen and Herbert Spencer. All together now:

“Well, now, take down your fishin’ pole and meet me at the fishin’ hole,

We may not get a bite all day, but don’t you rush away.

What a great place to rest your bones and mighty fine for skippin’ stones,

You’ll feel fresh as a lemonade, a-settin’ in the shade.

Whether it’s hot, whether it’s cool, oh what a spot for whistlin’ like a fool.

What a fine day to take a stroll and wander by the fishin’ hole,

I can’t think of a better way to pass the time o’ day.

We’ll have no need to call the roll when we get to the fishin’ hole,

There’ll be you, me, and Old Dog Trey, to doodle time away.

If we don’t hook a perch or bass, we’ll cool our toes in dewy grass,

Or else pull up a weed to chaw, and maybe set and jaw.

Hangin’ around, takin’ our ease, watchin’ that hound a-scratchin’ at his fleas.

Come on, take down your fishin’ pole and meet me at the fishin’ hole,

I can’t think of a better way to pass the time o’day.

WHEN GOD CREATED FATHERS

When the good Lord was creating fathers, He started with a tall frame. And a female angel nearby said, “What kind of father is that? If you’re going to make children so close to the ground, why have you put fathers up so high? He won’t be able to shoot marbles without kneeling, tuck a child in bed without bending, or even kiss a child without a lot of stooping.”

And God smiled and said, “Yes, but if I make him child size, who would children have to look up to?”

And when God made a father’s hands, they were large and sinewy.

And the angel shook her head sadly and said, “Do You know what You’re doing? Large hands are clumsy. They can’t manage diaper pins, small buttons, rubber bands on pony tails or even remove splinters caused by baseball bats.”

God smiled and said, “I know, but they’re large enough to hold everything a small boy empties from his pockets at the end of a day…yet small enough to cup a child’s face.”

Then God molded long, slim legs and broad shoulders.

The angel nearly had a heart attack. “Boy, this is the end of the week, all right,” she clucked. “Do You realize You just made a father without a lap? How is he going to pull a child close to him without the kid falling between his legs?”

God smiled and said, “A mother needs a lap. A father needs strong shoulders to pull a sled, balance a boy on a bicycle or hold a sleepy head on the way home from the circus.”

God was in the middle of creating two of the largest feet anyone had ever seen when the angel could contain herself no longer. “That’s not fair. Do You honestly think those large boats are going to dig out of bed early in the morning when the baby cries? Or walk through a small birthday party without crushing at least three of the guests?”

And God smiled and said, “They’ll work. You’ll see. They’ll support a small child who wants to “ride a horse to Banbury Cross” or scare off mice at the summer cabin, or display shoes that will be a challenge to fill.”

God worked throughout the night, giving the father few words, but a firm authoritative voice; eyes that see everything, but remain calm and tolerant.

Finally, almost as an afterthought, He added tears. Then He turned to the angel and said, “Now are you satisfied that he can love as much as a mother?”

And the angel shutteth up!

By Erma Bombeck

PARISH NEWS DEADLINE

The deadline for turning in articles and calendar information for the Parish News is the 20^th of each month. Thank you for your cooperation.

ADDRESS CHANGE? If you or someone you know has had a change of address or phone number within this past year, please inform the Church Office as soon as possible. Thank you for your help!